Pokémon :: Dark Science Theater
May. 12th, 2009 12:32 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
grapegardenWhat little fic Puri could find for Rise of Darkrai disappoints her. D: Really? Such a hate boner for Baron Alberto? That makes me sad. D: Oh well, lucky for us, we have Mystery Science Theater! There's two fics Puri wanted to MST, and they're both inspired from each other! Each MST can be treated as separate, but since they're connected, think of this as the first part before a sequel. :o
Title: Dark Science Theater
Author: I Am SomeoneI Am No One/Shamanic Shaymin
Fandom: Pokémon
Genre: Angst/MST. My my!
Rating: R
Warnings: Crude humor, language, sexual innuendo. Wangst overload in the original fic.
Ships/Characters: Implied Darkrai/Alicia & Darkrai/Alice (Fic), Lake Trio (MST)
Finished: Yes and No. A sequel is on the way!
Original: Here.
Azelf: ...Oi voy.
Mesprit: What is it?
Azelf: Arceus likes us. He reeeeeeeeeeeeally likes us.
Uxie: You look sour, Azelf. Is it a Fic Sign?
Azelf: Bingo.
Mesprit: Then we're on our way!
The Hatred For The Shadow
Azelf: Peter Pan says this is the last straw!
So…I was inspired by Glory For Sleep’s ‘Dream to Make Believe’ to make this. Enough said. It’s from Darkrai’s P.O.V…
Hints of Alicia/Darkrai, very, very slight Alice/Darkrai
Uxie: I mustn't have been keeping in line with fandom these days. I had no idea Darkrai was the new Edward Cullen.
Mesprit: Now we've got two Bellas? D:
Azelf: Dude Alicia, Darkrai's very very slightly cheating on you!
:-:
Uxie: A crying smilie. How oddly fitting.
Azelf: *whine*
You always accuse me of finding satisfaction in watching people and Pokemon tremble and scream in their slumber, their minds torched with searing images of pain and horror.
Azelf: Darkrai does! I wouldn't blame him. :D
Uxie: He's going to have a word with you when this is over...
You, my pink haired fellow,
Mesprit: Darkrai is addressing a Jigglypuff! :DDD
Uxie: You mean Baron Alberto ISN'T a redhead?
Azelf: Wow, I'm right! I KNEW the Baron's hairstyle was suggestive!
convince the others to rebel against me, even if I am injured and helpless.
Uxie: I'm afraid it's the reality of MMORPGs.
Of course, that’s a very unlikely situation. You always find a way, a contemptible excuse, to spark anger and hatred into the hearts of the townspeople of Alamos Town.
Azelf: You mean Alamos Town can't come up with excuses by themselves?
Mesprit: *as a villager* He turned me into a newt!
Uxie: A newt?
Mesprit: ...I got better.
Both: ...BURN HIM ANYWAY!
What I am to you, Baron Alberto?
Azelf: Chopped liver!? DDD:
Something of little significance?
All: Yes.
A threat to your fame?
Mesprit: *as Darkrai* You never call me anymore! D:
Better yet, the thing getting in your way to the woman you want?
Azelf: Ouch. Baron, you cheater! Leaving Darkrai on the first date!
Mesprit: *as Darkrai* You didn't ask my permission for a threeway! This relationship is over! Dl
You sicken me.
Mesprit: Are you still mad I gave a mohawk to your Persian?
Alice doesn’t love you. You should know this by now. Yet, you continue to use people to get what you want, like a spoiled child. You are nothing more than that, Alberto.
Uxie: Yet Alberto was still a spoiled brat even before meeting Alice. How do you diagnose that?
Why is it that you try and try to drive me out, screaming curses and tossing your Pokemon out to fight me,
Azelf: Yeah, heaven forbid a baron protect his city from a nightmare god with poor aim.
Mesprit: Poor baron. Punished for actually being noble!
even though it’s clear they don’t want to? I pity you.
Azelf: Not all of us can be a lazy fatass. Or Ash's Charizard.
Mesprit: *as Lickilicky* But Daddy! I dunwanna fight the big scary Legendary! DDDD: I wanna stay home and bake Poffins with you~!
Azelf: *as Alberto* GET YOUR SLIMY TONGUE OFF ME!
You know nothing of what I’ve had to go through to able to stay here.
Mesprit: *as Darkrai* Seriously, Alberto. We're in public!
Almost one hundred years of hatred trace back to that day in the garden.
Azelf: Dude. Let go already.
Uxie: *singing* And seeing how civilized men behave, he never forgot and he never forgave...
The day where the first human showed me kindness.
Azelf: *snicker*
The innocent child was young at the time; she did not know what she was getting herself into.
Azelf: *sporfle*
Uxie: Azelf...
Azelf: BLOWJOB! HA HA HA...! *dies*
Mesprit: I guess that did sound sketchy. :o
I tried to drive her away, but, she stayed, and offered me a home in the garden. I accepted.
Uxie: Darkrai, what sort of mess did you get yourself into?
Azelf: More like PEDOrai. :P
Mesprit: I'm more worried about Alicia. She's already experienced? D:
Uxie: She was a child and I was a child, in that kingdom by the sea...
From that day on, the people turned on her and actually went as far as injuring her.
Why?
Uxie: Alas, society frowns on such a relationship and general knowledge of sexual awakening.
Azelf: Try moving to Alabama.
Mesprit: I got a girlfriend... who lives in CANADA!
It’s just because she showed a simple act of goodness to me.
All: *simultaneous cough*
Azelf: Punching Raikou down the stairs got me bad looks, but really. No gesture of kindness could've been sweeter! :o
She healed me, as I was seriously injured, and she stayed with me through out her years.
Mesprit: Alicia was a nurse?
Uxie: No. All she did was play the Song of Healing on the leaf whistle and got a free mask.
She managed to last through the insults, the shunning, the death threats, and attempted murders. Just for me. A Pokemon that shows its victims horrific nightmares and laughs about it.
Azelf: Wow Darkrai, you are evil! See what I mean?
Uxie: Their tears are all the pay he ever needs.
It’s the only way to destroy my own paranoia.
Azelf: Violence! Like Quentin Taratino, it's a release! :D
And, do you know who started the rebellion against that poor child? The one who staged everything, down to the last insult, and the one who laughed at the child’s wild sobs and my rage?
All: The Butler did it!
Uxie: With the rope!
Mesprit: In the Space-Time Tower!
Your grandfather.
Mesprit: Huh? I always thought Alberto's granddaddy went off sipping martinis in the tropics!
Azelf: It's not his fault his grandson grew up to be an ass.
Surprised yet? Heh, I thought not.
Azelf: Why are we using some guy that didn't exist in the movie as a scapegoat?
Uxie: Because everyone was tired of putting the blame on Palkia.
Your grandfather’s hatred was sparked after my appearance and the fact that somebody showed me kindness. He was enraged that she would treat me with good will instead of attacking me, which is normally expected, seeing what I am. The whole thing was almost as popular as a world-class scandal.
Azelf: Wow, he was bored! Just like Hitler!
To me, it was living through another nightmarish hell.
Mesprit: How punny!
Every day, and every night, it was the same for Alicia.
Uxie: *as Alicia* Darkrai, I'm bored.
Azelf: *as Alicia* Something's wrong if it's more fun having sex with my husband than with you.
Mesprit: Burned!
Her schoolmates jeered at her, and she was, in fact, kicked out of school for a while.
Azelf: Damn, even her teachers hated her!
Mesprit: So much angst! :o
People would randomly attack her with cruel insults, and, when she grew older, they would make lewd comments on her sex life. For a while, she would even sleep with me in the gardens, crying like there was no tomorrow.
Those people disgusted me.
Uxie: Somehow Alicia was able to grow up into a stable grandmother instead of being a killer or committing suicide?
Azelf: We all know the story of Carrie White... if that's the case with Alicia, then I'd hate to know what Godey's like.
Mesprit: *as Godey* My nightmare is telling me to build my Oracion to share with the world! We must pray, child! We must pray!
There, just once, was a talk in the papers (Alicia would always fill me in on the news) about my counterpart, Cresselia. It talked about how good it was that she existed, and, hopefully, she would come to Alamos one day and banish me from the town, and watch over us, instead of me. I found it quite amusing.
Uxie: Me too. Knowing that Alamos probably thinks Cresselia is a lunatic. See? Luna-tic.
Mesprit: ...
Azelf: *groan*
Uxie: I'm amazed by my brilliance sometimes.
Don’t you see it yet? You are the reason Alice would never love you, besides the fact you are a flaming jerk, because she knows of what your grandfather caused, and why you continue the drama today.
Mesprit: Really? I thought Alice disliked Alberto for well, being Alberto!
Azelf: You dont need a few crummy relatives to tell her that!
Uxie: My my... history does repeat itself, does it? If we are to be copies of our ancestors... knowing his Puritan heritage, this will be of little comfort to Nathaniel Hawthorne.
Then, when I started appearing in the town, trying to warn the citizens about Dialga and Palkia, what do you think they greeted me with? Attacks and insults.
Mesprit: Duh.
Azelf: *dramatic pose* Oh I'm so persecuted!
I fought back. What else do you expect?
Mesprit: Elton John! :D
There was that Ash boy…the boy your foolishness caused to dive into ten straight hours of torture.
Azelf: Naaaaaah. Ash doesn't need help in digging his own grave. He dug it twice already! :o
He loathed me at first. Attacked me at every chance he could find. Of course, who do you think caused that?
Uxie: Joseph McCarthy.
You.
Azelf: Me? Oh! *slams hand over heart* I'm scandalized!
I tried to warn him in his dreams, about the upcoming destruction that would soon wreak havoc on this town. But, that didn’t seem to work, so, I appeared personally to his group.
Mesprit: Maybe Ash just thought you were freaking him out. D:
Azelf: Some prophet you make.
Then, you just had to show up with that news crew.
Uxie: Oh yes, Team Rocket. Fit to record television scandal.
I had no choice but to fight. And, when I tried to put your Pokemon to sleep and try and end things peacefully, things went wrong.
Mesprit: No wonder Darkrai's always in solitude. He's got the fighting skills of a computer AI!
I accidentally put other people’s Pokemon to sleep, and you seized the opportunity.
Azelf: Hehe. "Accidentally."
Uxie: What a noble Pokémon.
You shouted to the people that this was I what I truly was: A heartless beast that cared not about what happened to its victims.
They attacked.
Mesprit: KILL THE BEAST!
All: KILL THE BEAST!
I fled shortly after that. I was confronted by the boy once more, and I replied to his insult, “Wait! You don’t understand!” That caught his attention, and he actually wanted to hear what I had to say.
Uxie: Actually, I heard "Go back." Very articulate, Darkrai.
And guess who showed up and ruined the last chance I had at telling my side of the story? You.
Azelf: I'm sick of being blamed for everything. Who am I? Palkia?
Ash tried to stop you, but, being the stubborn hothead you are, you attacked instead. I put your Pokemon to sleep and disappeared into the shadows. The spacial distortion that was going on at the moment caused your Pokemon’s nightmares to manifest themselves into reality. So, you turned into a Lickilicky.
I found it quite fitting for you.
Mesprit: Alberto couldn't even kiss right. D:
Then the fog caused by Palkia rolled around the town, cutting off all external communication and transportation out of the town.
Uxie: Much to the annoyance of those playing World of Warcraft.
Azelf: Let's pop out those DSs and play some Diamond! Now to trade for my best friend's Charizard... FUCK!
And who did you blame all of that on? Me, of course. You led an armed rebellion, intent on not just attacking, but killing. I thwarted those plans, and I went head-to-head with you in a battle. I won, of course, and I didn’t see you after that.
Azelf: You're better off not knowing what Baron Lickilicky was doing. Especially with Team Rocket.
I gave up my life for the sake of Alamos.
Mesprit: *as Nelson* HAW HAW!
I sacrificed myself so those two kids could calm the enraged Dialga and Palkia down with the Oracion and restore the town after most of it was destroyed.
Uxie: Too bad Ash and Dawn spent most of it gawking at his death.
Azelf: *as Darkrai* You damn kids! Git going or I'll haunt you!
And, you reward me with even more hatred than before, even though some of the townspeople finally changed their point of views on me, after one hundred years of hearing about the same thing over and over.
Mesprit: Alberto was there to see it all, and admitted in the manga adaptation that Darkrai was actually trying to protect Alamos. I guess that doesn't count, huh?
Azelf: Their date must have really sucked.
You know nothing. Nothing.
Uxie: *singing* I never said you were a mistake at all, you got it all wrong, you're misunderstanding...
Why is it that you take vast amounts of pleasure in thinking of how well you are manipulating most of the townspeople into thinking about what I am?
Uxie: You mean Alberto doesn't receive his satisfaction posing before his reflection in a mirror?
Mesprit: Serious bad guy material! :o
I am much worse than your pitiful excuse of a description of a true nightmare. Much, much worse.
Uxie: Really? How about Uboa?
I could destroy the entire Earth and cover it in darkness if I wanted to. I could care less about what happens to most humans on this fraudulent planet.
Azelf: Ooooooh! Big words! Except I read that at first as "flatulent" planet.
Mesprit: Global warming. What a stinker!
You are corrupt, Baron Alberto, not me. I would thoroughly enjoy killing you, so you cannot pass on anymore stupid genes of yours, and the hate that was passed on to you.
Mesprit: Does that mean no more sexy redcoat uniform? D: If the baron has something going on for him...
Uxie: Who else will continue the voice-acting legacy of Kōichi Yamadera?
You will be the fall of Alamos Town.
Azelf: Oh puh-lease! Not this blame-game garbage again.
Mesprit: You mean it's not Love in the Forest?
It’s time to stop and smell the Roselia, Alberto. Face the facts and expose yourself to the bitter truth.
Uxie: That stopping to smell Roselia's hands is really not a good idea. Unless you like jamming your head with poisonous thorns.
I will be here forever.
Mesprit: Remind me to never date Darkrai. Sheesh. D:
Alice will never love you.
Uxie: That's a given.
I have exposed the darker side of Alamos Town.
Azelf: And Randy Newman wrote a song about it! It's celebrated in the Space-Time Tower as the Alamos Anthem.
There is nothing you can do about it.
Azelf: No changing the theme! Sorry.
And, should you want another fight with me, all you have to do is awaken the true rage in my already scarred heart.
Mesprit: All Baron Alberto has to do is stand in front of a mirror and say "Bloody Mary" three times.
Uxie: Or "Darkrai, your penis is small."
:-:
Wow.
I think that was the most angsty piece I’ve ever written.
Uxie: Trust us. It could have been worse.
So, give me your opinions! Reviews are much loved!
Arceus: What did you say, Uxie?
Azelf: Oh no...
Arceus: I have one more fic for you to read, which happens to be inspired by this one! Enjoy your break, my lovely three...
Lake Trio: ...
Uxie: Oops...
Azelf: You had to say it, didn't you?
Mesprit: It's only one more! Let's make the most of it and we'll be free!
The End...? (To be continued... in the sequel!)
Title: Dark Science Theater
Author: I Am SomeoneI Am No One/Shamanic Shaymin
Fandom: Pokémon
Genre: Angst/MST. My my!
Rating: R
Warnings: Crude humor, language, sexual innuendo. Wangst overload in the original fic.
Ships/Characters: Implied Darkrai/Alicia & Darkrai/Alice (Fic), Lake Trio (MST)
Finished: Yes and No. A sequel is on the way!
Original: Here.
Azelf: ...Oi voy.
Mesprit: What is it?
Azelf: Arceus likes us. He reeeeeeeeeeeeally likes us.
Uxie: You look sour, Azelf. Is it a Fic Sign?
Azelf: Bingo.
Mesprit: Then we're on our way!
The Hatred For The Shadow: The MST
The Hatred For The Shadow
Azelf: Peter Pan says this is the last straw!
So…I was inspired by Glory For Sleep’s ‘Dream to Make Believe’ to make this. Enough said. It’s from Darkrai’s P.O.V…
Hints of Alicia/Darkrai, very, very slight Alice/Darkrai
Uxie: I mustn't have been keeping in line with fandom these days. I had no idea Darkrai was the new Edward Cullen.
Mesprit: Now we've got two Bellas? D:
Azelf: Dude Alicia, Darkrai's very very slightly cheating on you!
:-:
Uxie: A crying smilie. How oddly fitting.
Azelf: *whine*
You always accuse me of finding satisfaction in watching people and Pokemon tremble and scream in their slumber, their minds torched with searing images of pain and horror.
Azelf: Darkrai does! I wouldn't blame him. :D
Uxie: He's going to have a word with you when this is over...
You, my pink haired fellow,
Mesprit: Darkrai is addressing a Jigglypuff! :DDD
Uxie: You mean Baron Alberto ISN'T a redhead?
Azelf: Wow, I'm right! I KNEW the Baron's hairstyle was suggestive!
convince the others to rebel against me, even if I am injured and helpless.
Uxie: I'm afraid it's the reality of MMORPGs.
Of course, that’s a very unlikely situation. You always find a way, a contemptible excuse, to spark anger and hatred into the hearts of the townspeople of Alamos Town.
Azelf: You mean Alamos Town can't come up with excuses by themselves?
Mesprit: *as a villager* He turned me into a newt!
Uxie: A newt?
Mesprit: ...I got better.
Both: ...BURN HIM ANYWAY!
What I am to you, Baron Alberto?
Azelf: Chopped liver!? DDD:
Something of little significance?
All: Yes.
A threat to your fame?
Mesprit: *as Darkrai* You never call me anymore! D:
Better yet, the thing getting in your way to the woman you want?
Azelf: Ouch. Baron, you cheater! Leaving Darkrai on the first date!
Mesprit: *as Darkrai* You didn't ask my permission for a threeway! This relationship is over! Dl
You sicken me.
Mesprit: Are you still mad I gave a mohawk to your Persian?
Alice doesn’t love you. You should know this by now. Yet, you continue to use people to get what you want, like a spoiled child. You are nothing more than that, Alberto.
Uxie: Yet Alberto was still a spoiled brat even before meeting Alice. How do you diagnose that?
Why is it that you try and try to drive me out, screaming curses and tossing your Pokemon out to fight me,
Azelf: Yeah, heaven forbid a baron protect his city from a nightmare god with poor aim.
Mesprit: Poor baron. Punished for actually being noble!
even though it’s clear they don’t want to? I pity you.
Azelf: Not all of us can be a lazy fatass. Or Ash's Charizard.
Mesprit: *as Lickilicky* But Daddy! I dunwanna fight the big scary Legendary! DDDD: I wanna stay home and bake Poffins with you~!
Azelf: *as Alberto* GET YOUR SLIMY TONGUE OFF ME!
You know nothing of what I’ve had to go through to able to stay here.
Mesprit: *as Darkrai* Seriously, Alberto. We're in public!
Almost one hundred years of hatred trace back to that day in the garden.
Azelf: Dude. Let go already.
Uxie: *singing* And seeing how civilized men behave, he never forgot and he never forgave...
The day where the first human showed me kindness.
Azelf: *snicker*
The innocent child was young at the time; she did not know what she was getting herself into.
Azelf: *sporfle*
Uxie: Azelf...
Azelf: BLOWJOB! HA HA HA...! *dies*
Mesprit: I guess that did sound sketchy. :o
I tried to drive her away, but, she stayed, and offered me a home in the garden. I accepted.
Uxie: Darkrai, what sort of mess did you get yourself into?
Azelf: More like PEDOrai. :P
Mesprit: I'm more worried about Alicia. She's already experienced? D:
Uxie: She was a child and I was a child, in that kingdom by the sea...
From that day on, the people turned on her and actually went as far as injuring her.
Why?
Uxie: Alas, society frowns on such a relationship and general knowledge of sexual awakening.
Azelf: Try moving to Alabama.
Mesprit: I got a girlfriend... who lives in CANADA!
It’s just because she showed a simple act of goodness to me.
All: *simultaneous cough*
Azelf: Punching Raikou down the stairs got me bad looks, but really. No gesture of kindness could've been sweeter! :o
She healed me, as I was seriously injured, and she stayed with me through out her years.
Mesprit: Alicia was a nurse?
Uxie: No. All she did was play the Song of Healing on the leaf whistle and got a free mask.
She managed to last through the insults, the shunning, the death threats, and attempted murders. Just for me. A Pokemon that shows its victims horrific nightmares and laughs about it.
Azelf: Wow Darkrai, you are evil! See what I mean?
Uxie: Their tears are all the pay he ever needs.
It’s the only way to destroy my own paranoia.
Azelf: Violence! Like Quentin Taratino, it's a release! :D
And, do you know who started the rebellion against that poor child? The one who staged everything, down to the last insult, and the one who laughed at the child’s wild sobs and my rage?
All: The Butler did it!
Uxie: With the rope!
Mesprit: In the Space-Time Tower!
Your grandfather.
Mesprit: Huh? I always thought Alberto's granddaddy went off sipping martinis in the tropics!
Azelf: It's not his fault his grandson grew up to be an ass.
Surprised yet? Heh, I thought not.
Azelf: Why are we using some guy that didn't exist in the movie as a scapegoat?
Uxie: Because everyone was tired of putting the blame on Palkia.
Your grandfather’s hatred was sparked after my appearance and the fact that somebody showed me kindness. He was enraged that she would treat me with good will instead of attacking me, which is normally expected, seeing what I am. The whole thing was almost as popular as a world-class scandal.
Azelf: Wow, he was bored! Just like Hitler!
To me, it was living through another nightmarish hell.
Mesprit: How punny!
Every day, and every night, it was the same for Alicia.
Uxie: *as Alicia* Darkrai, I'm bored.
Azelf: *as Alicia* Something's wrong if it's more fun having sex with my husband than with you.
Mesprit: Burned!
Her schoolmates jeered at her, and she was, in fact, kicked out of school for a while.
Azelf: Damn, even her teachers hated her!
Mesprit: So much angst! :o
People would randomly attack her with cruel insults, and, when she grew older, they would make lewd comments on her sex life. For a while, she would even sleep with me in the gardens, crying like there was no tomorrow.
Those people disgusted me.
Uxie: Somehow Alicia was able to grow up into a stable grandmother instead of being a killer or committing suicide?
Azelf: We all know the story of Carrie White... if that's the case with Alicia, then I'd hate to know what Godey's like.
Mesprit: *as Godey* My nightmare is telling me to build my Oracion to share with the world! We must pray, child! We must pray!
There, just once, was a talk in the papers (Alicia would always fill me in on the news) about my counterpart, Cresselia. It talked about how good it was that she existed, and, hopefully, she would come to Alamos one day and banish me from the town, and watch over us, instead of me. I found it quite amusing.
Uxie: Me too. Knowing that Alamos probably thinks Cresselia is a lunatic. See? Luna-tic.
Mesprit: ...
Azelf: *groan*
Uxie: I'm amazed by my brilliance sometimes.
Don’t you see it yet? You are the reason Alice would never love you, besides the fact you are a flaming jerk, because she knows of what your grandfather caused, and why you continue the drama today.
Mesprit: Really? I thought Alice disliked Alberto for well, being Alberto!
Azelf: You dont need a few crummy relatives to tell her that!
Uxie: My my... history does repeat itself, does it? If we are to be copies of our ancestors... knowing his Puritan heritage, this will be of little comfort to Nathaniel Hawthorne.
Then, when I started appearing in the town, trying to warn the citizens about Dialga and Palkia, what do you think they greeted me with? Attacks and insults.
Mesprit: Duh.
Azelf: *dramatic pose* Oh I'm so persecuted!
I fought back. What else do you expect?
Mesprit: Elton John! :D
There was that Ash boy…the boy your foolishness caused to dive into ten straight hours of torture.
Azelf: Naaaaaah. Ash doesn't need help in digging his own grave. He dug it twice already! :o
He loathed me at first. Attacked me at every chance he could find. Of course, who do you think caused that?
Uxie: Joseph McCarthy.
You.
Azelf: Me? Oh! *slams hand over heart* I'm scandalized!
I tried to warn him in his dreams, about the upcoming destruction that would soon wreak havoc on this town. But, that didn’t seem to work, so, I appeared personally to his group.
Mesprit: Maybe Ash just thought you were freaking him out. D:
Azelf: Some prophet you make.
Then, you just had to show up with that news crew.
Uxie: Oh yes, Team Rocket. Fit to record television scandal.
I had no choice but to fight. And, when I tried to put your Pokemon to sleep and try and end things peacefully, things went wrong.
Mesprit: No wonder Darkrai's always in solitude. He's got the fighting skills of a computer AI!
I accidentally put other people’s Pokemon to sleep, and you seized the opportunity.
Azelf: Hehe. "Accidentally."
Uxie: What a noble Pokémon.
You shouted to the people that this was I what I truly was: A heartless beast that cared not about what happened to its victims.
They attacked.
Mesprit: KILL THE BEAST!
All: KILL THE BEAST!
I fled shortly after that. I was confronted by the boy once more, and I replied to his insult, “Wait! You don’t understand!” That caught his attention, and he actually wanted to hear what I had to say.
Uxie: Actually, I heard "Go back." Very articulate, Darkrai.
And guess who showed up and ruined the last chance I had at telling my side of the story? You.
Azelf: I'm sick of being blamed for everything. Who am I? Palkia?
Ash tried to stop you, but, being the stubborn hothead you are, you attacked instead. I put your Pokemon to sleep and disappeared into the shadows. The spacial distortion that was going on at the moment caused your Pokemon’s nightmares to manifest themselves into reality. So, you turned into a Lickilicky.
I found it quite fitting for you.
Mesprit: Alberto couldn't even kiss right. D:
Then the fog caused by Palkia rolled around the town, cutting off all external communication and transportation out of the town.
Uxie: Much to the annoyance of those playing World of Warcraft.
Azelf: Let's pop out those DSs and play some Diamond! Now to trade for my best friend's Charizard... FUCK!
And who did you blame all of that on? Me, of course. You led an armed rebellion, intent on not just attacking, but killing. I thwarted those plans, and I went head-to-head with you in a battle. I won, of course, and I didn’t see you after that.
Azelf: You're better off not knowing what Baron Lickilicky was doing. Especially with Team Rocket.
I gave up my life for the sake of Alamos.
Mesprit: *as Nelson* HAW HAW!
I sacrificed myself so those two kids could calm the enraged Dialga and Palkia down with the Oracion and restore the town after most of it was destroyed.
Uxie: Too bad Ash and Dawn spent most of it gawking at his death.
Azelf: *as Darkrai* You damn kids! Git going or I'll haunt you!
And, you reward me with even more hatred than before, even though some of the townspeople finally changed their point of views on me, after one hundred years of hearing about the same thing over and over.
Mesprit: Alberto was there to see it all, and admitted in the manga adaptation that Darkrai was actually trying to protect Alamos. I guess that doesn't count, huh?
Azelf: Their date must have really sucked.
You know nothing. Nothing.
Uxie: *singing* I never said you were a mistake at all, you got it all wrong, you're misunderstanding...
Why is it that you take vast amounts of pleasure in thinking of how well you are manipulating most of the townspeople into thinking about what I am?
Uxie: You mean Alberto doesn't receive his satisfaction posing before his reflection in a mirror?
Mesprit: Serious bad guy material! :o
I am much worse than your pitiful excuse of a description of a true nightmare. Much, much worse.
Uxie: Really? How about Uboa?
I could destroy the entire Earth and cover it in darkness if I wanted to. I could care less about what happens to most humans on this fraudulent planet.
Azelf: Ooooooh! Big words! Except I read that at first as "flatulent" planet.
Mesprit: Global warming. What a stinker!
You are corrupt, Baron Alberto, not me. I would thoroughly enjoy killing you, so you cannot pass on anymore stupid genes of yours, and the hate that was passed on to you.
Mesprit: Does that mean no more sexy redcoat uniform? D: If the baron has something going on for him...
Uxie: Who else will continue the voice-acting legacy of Kōichi Yamadera?
You will be the fall of Alamos Town.
Azelf: Oh puh-lease! Not this blame-game garbage again.
Mesprit: You mean it's not Love in the Forest?
It’s time to stop and smell the Roselia, Alberto. Face the facts and expose yourself to the bitter truth.
Uxie: That stopping to smell Roselia's hands is really not a good idea. Unless you like jamming your head with poisonous thorns.
I will be here forever.
Mesprit: Remind me to never date Darkrai. Sheesh. D:
Alice will never love you.
Uxie: That's a given.
I have exposed the darker side of Alamos Town.
Azelf: And Randy Newman wrote a song about it! It's celebrated in the Space-Time Tower as the Alamos Anthem.
There is nothing you can do about it.
Azelf: No changing the theme! Sorry.
And, should you want another fight with me, all you have to do is awaken the true rage in my already scarred heart.
Mesprit: All Baron Alberto has to do is stand in front of a mirror and say "Bloody Mary" three times.
Uxie: Or "Darkrai, your penis is small."
:-:
Wow.
I think that was the most angsty piece I’ve ever written.
Uxie: Trust us. It could have been worse.
So, give me your opinions! Reviews are much loved!
Arceus: What did you say, Uxie?
Azelf: Oh no...
Arceus: I have one more fic for you to read, which happens to be inspired by this one! Enjoy your break, my lovely three...
Lake Trio: ...
Uxie: Oops...
Azelf: You had to say it, didn't you?
Mesprit: It's only one more! Let's make the most of it and we'll be free!
The End...? (To be continued... in the sequel!)
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no subject
Date: 2009-05-12 03:58 pm (UTC)Mesprit: *as a villager* He turned me into a newt!
Uxie: A newt?
Mesprit: ...I got better.
Both: ...BURN HIM ANYWAY!
AHAHAH AWESOME. Monty Python is nothing but pure awesome and using Holy Grail was the best idea ever.
Azelf: Not all of us can be a lazy fatass. Or Ash's Charizard.
I love Ash's Charizard because of his personality, and the reference to him makes me a happy Sora. <3
Uxie: No. All she did was play the Song of Healing on the leaf whistle and got a free mask.
And another way to get a happy Sora is mentioning Majora's Mask! <3 <3 <3 Favorite Zelda game ever.
All: The Butler did it!
Uxie: With the rope!
Mesprit: In the Space-Time Tower!
Although I've never played Clue personally, I know enough of its popularity to say YOU WIN.
Azelf: Naaaaaah. Ash doesn't need help in digging his own grave. He dug it twice already! :o
Here's where I'm confused. When does it happen?
I can't wait to read the next MST. <3
no subject
Date: 2009-05-12 05:10 pm (UTC)Ash died once in the TV series and in the first movie; he and Pikachu were crushed by a chandelier in the Ghastly/Haunter/Gengar episode before being allowed to return to their bodies. And we know the poor guy sacrificed himself and turned to stone. :)
no subject
Date: 2009-05-12 11:19 pm (UTC)Majora's Mask was the first Zelda I actually played. *nods*
Then he almost died plenty of times in the movies and the series. Like when Misty had to give him CPR (or was it?) in the second movie, almost falling into crystal spikes in the third, that goo moment in the Lucario movie (numbah 8?)... That guy really can't be killed, can't he?