Undertale :: Surprises in the Bedroom

[grapegarden]

This was a part of a series of ficlets I wrote for Undertale Shipping Pride Month last year. Alas, I got distracted and never finished the challenge, but I didn't want these ficlets to rot alone in tumblr's void, so I decided to upload them here as well.

Anyway, let’s hear it for Soriel! :D I like the idea of a ship where one or both people find love again after a divorce or break-up. It shows it’s okay if the person you end up being with isn’t your first love, and Soriel fits the bill perfectly. :) This is me playing with the "Are they or aren't they talking about dirty things?" comedy trope. Whether they are or not, the most offensive thing about this ficlet is all the horrible puns. :P

Title: Surprises in the Bedroom
Author: Puri
Fandom: Undertale
Genre: Humor/Romance
Rating: R
Warnings: SCANDALOUS COLLECTIONS GALORE
Ships/Characters: Toriel/Sans
Finished: Yes

"Sans? Before we go any further in our relationship, there's something I must tell you."
"Sure Tori. What's up?"
"I've been keeping this a secret for a long time. Do you promise not to tell anyone?"
"Not a soul."
"Good. As I'm sure you know, everybody has different tastes. I might have something I find enjoyable while you find it displeasing, and vice versa. But as long as we respect each other's likes and dislikes, we can still get along even if we disagree. This particular thing I'm fond of... it's rather inappropriate for an old lady like me. But I don't believe you'll think less of me when I tell you what it is. You see..."

~

The lights in Sans' eyes widened when he bore witness to the contents of the bottom drawer. There were so many of them... each of them organized in neat little rows. Blue, red, purple... some even glittered. Several small enough to sit on the palm of his hand and others that could fit a giraffe.

"...You too, Tori? I'll be darned."
"I see what you did there, Sans." Toriel giggled. "I take it you're not offended by my sock collection?"
"Of course not. I've been building a collection of my own myself. You can say I'm... stocking up." He unfolded a pair of black socks with pastel green heels and toes decorated all over with rabbits. "Wow... you got everything. Ankle socks, knee socks, fuzzy socks, geometric socks... and the good ol' classic white socks. Gotta love these."
"I'm glad you like them! I'd be interested in seeing yours sometime."
"Oh no, mine's nothing special. Just a bunch of old gym socks." Typically, Sans didn't care if he was messy, but... "You wouldn't want to go into my room. Trust me."
"I see." Toriel saw the insecurity in his eyes and gave him a reassuring smile. Depression had a toll on one's ability to take care of themselves—but Sans is trying. Papyrus had warned her of his laziness and shared his concerns about him. He seemed surprised his brother had been willing to help her in the kitchen; usually he had to fight tooth and nail to get him to pick something up from the floor. Something changed in him since they got to see each other face-to-face and were no longer separated by the door in the Ruins. ("Lady Asgore!!! What have you done with Sans!?") Needless to say, the two skeletons' lives changed for the better since meeting her. "Perhaps when you're ready."
"...Sounds good." The skeleton said after some consideration. "I'm sure I'll have saved plenty of more socks by the time you're there."
"I'll look forward to it, Sans. I promise I won't rush you and be a... heel about it. That's toe-ing the line."
"Heh... Thanks Tori." Sans grinned—more than usual. "Okay, let's see what else we got." The skeleton folded up the bunny socks the best he could before putting them away. He stuck his hand into the back of the drawer for potential overlooked treasures... Whoa. That did not feel like a sock. The skeleton pulled out the dildo and examined it in great fascination. The base—the sheath and balls—was wrinkled and dark as night, but the rest of the toy glowed with an alluring silky cyan. His phalanges circled the shaft from the bulge at the bottom, tracing ridges on its underside as they worked its way up. The toy curved toward the tip and its glans were as smooth as the finest leather.

"I was going to save that as a gift for you on a special night." Toriel explained. "But since you're already here, I suppose there's no harm in giving it to you now. After all, we make a... lovely pair!"
"Hehe. Niiiiice." Sans snickered, unable to suppress his laughter. "Wait... you mean this?" He pointed to the dildo's balls. "Or the socks?"

Toriel snorted, joining her partner in his merriment. Perhaps it's a little immature of them. But who are they to knit-pick?